It’s been a long six months. I’ve moved and been through change enough to recognize the emotions that come with it. After college I moved 5 times in 7 years, and knew that in each new place, the first year would suck. I accepted it, knew it, and lived it, but that didn’t make it any easier.
The last six months have sort of been like that, and somehow different too. There has certainly been change, but nothing monumental. Finishing school, starting internship, job searching. Relationships have changed too, shifted, but again nothing new. Been there, done that. Somehow though, it was different. Harder. I would find myself thinking…I’m struggling. And it sounds so…whiny…when you say it out loud. Because it’s not clinical depression, it’s not like I had anything bad really going on. Internship certainly didn’t help. For seven weeks I didn’t talk to another adult most days at work. Or at home.
And feeling so out of sorts…just makes you question yourself. And feel fragile. And then something or someone looks at you wrong and you fall apart. Yeah, there’s that. It’s certainly gotten better, now that some things have been settled, but it’s still there. A sideways glance, a raised eyebrow and I’m a mess. And I know, this too shall pass. Make it through all the transitions and it’ll be good. Soon, soon.