Note to self: Do not ever leave keys on your desk at your adjuncting job and close the self-locking door. If you do so, you will have to use a student’s cell phone to call campus security since with all the construction you can’t find a public phone. Campus security will tell you they don’t have a key for faculty offices, but they will try anyway. They will come and try their one magic key, but it will not work. They will tell you that maintenance has a key, but they won’t be on campus until 11pm, which has you arriving home at about 12:30 AM. You will need to call the dean who gave you her home phone number, but who is now in Tennessee. You will then try the head of the department whose pod so graciously houses your office, but he will not be home either.
Then, miraculously, one of your students will know an emergency maintenance number and will dial it for you. You will talk to an understandably grumpy man who is 10 miles out of town but will ever so slightly grudgingly come back to let you in to your office. Your class will cheer when you return with your purse and other belongings, and you will be much, much more careful next time.